WTF! AYS, video game testers?
So, I have been spending the last couple of weeks jerking off to (while play testing) “Lara Croft (aka: Angelina Jolie) versus Aliens and Predators“, a new game being put out by Kapcum. I may be breaking a Non-Disclosure Agreement here, but the goal of the game is to get an Alien’s smaller second mouth into Angelina Jolie’s snatch, while avoiding the Brad Pitt looking Predators.
This is one of them thar massively online games where a billion or so pussy starved kids pretend to be social aware, which such great …
… Conversation starters: “Fuck you, dick!” and “UR a N00b!”
… Character names like: xPussyLicker and Kok Teiz.
… Deals like: “400 AJ pubes for $20.00 US! Fast power revering; you get boom boom in no time frat!” They are Chinese, you see, so their keyboards force them to type like that. And unlike the producers of the current Red Dawn movie, I ain’t afraid to piss some people who smell like onions stuck in sweat socks and who I can blind fold with dental floss.