WTF! AYS, National Security Agency?
Fuck, I don’t even know who I’m calling stupid in this post. Let’s just go with the NSA so I can be one of the cool kids added to a watch list or two.
I would tell you where I’ve been over the last weeks and months, but the anal probe I received will explode and turn me into an unwilling jihadist. For fucks sake these dipshit Islamists are getting sneaky; but remember, in the Mormon, errr, Muslim world you’re not gay if you’re pitching – (fucking an underage boy, someone from another culture, drunk, etc.) – only if you’re catching.
Using Islamo-logic: Even though I attempted to fight off my attackers, since they succeeded and (of course) will not admit to witnessing my rape, I must be sentenced to death for homosexuality and adultery. Multiple people kidnap me while I’m eating Cheetos and jerking off to that blond chick from Game of Thrones. They all rape me, leaving my bung hole filled with man sauce and some jizz bomb, and this is somehow MY fault?
Let this be a warning to you! First it was IEDs, then it was cooking implements, now it’s bunghole injections! Is there no lengths these stone age warriors will not go to be allowed to remain in the stone age?